a dose of feminism

those of you who know me know that i love jezebel. well, i saw this comment this morning, and of course it made me insta-happy.  yay for feminist men 🙂

I used to have a line. I’m from Philadelphia, land of Ben Franklin, so I’m full of little lines. “I’m a feminist in the oldest sense of the word, in that I have nothing in particular against women.”
It’s a funny line, but I’ve decided to retire it.
I’m having a soul-searching kind of morning, ladies. I’m realizing that, even though I’m a slightly-to-the-right-of Marx, Jezebel-reading, died in the wool rabble-rousing despiser of the patriarchy that I was born into, I have still underestimated what you all go through on a day-to-day basis. Not completely, mind you. I’ve long known what advantages I’ve had. I do not have to worry about my physical safety on a simple walk home, nor about garnering equal pay. I do not feel the pressure to “look the part” (because frankly I am the part). Men are not divided and conquered by the hiding-in-plain-sight forces of consumer culture as women have been from the start. Men do not have to worry about “reverse sexism” because, like it’s equally specious counterpart “reverse racism”, it doesn’t exist because true power only resides in the other party (though some men all over internet message boards this week are clinging to the idea). I’ve always been ready to admit that I’d never trade places with a woman – it’s simply too hard of a life for me. I’m weak. I’m able to be weak and still thrive, because I’m a man. That’s how the game is set up and I’ve taken advantage of it.
Yet, the past few months and especially the last week has taught me that I underestimated this- my every thought, question, conviction, and concern isn’t automatically subject to being undercut. When you consider how hard women have to fight to develop a certain amount of agency, to be looked at as worthy of being heard, before they can even get started on real work, it’s amazing that any of you are able to go beyond that and make a real difference in our crumbling culture and civilization.
So do me a favor – next time one of you is annoying me and I tell you to shut the fuck up, look me right back in the eyes and say “I have been shutting the fuck up. Now it’s your turn.” I swear to god I’ll listen.

it was in reply to this post.


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